Going to clean my pens with some warm water

Boarding a plane shortly

Going to one up all the Pokémon purists by refusing to acknowledge any Pokémon after “the original 70”

I know all 30 digits of Pi

Doug Ford just swallowed a bee while talking about privatizing health care zpr.io/VnPz9B4C3gcg

Calgary Transit: We’ll Show Up One Minute Before the Uber You Ordered out of Desperation Because We Were 20 Minutes Late!

I’ve collected the famous disease

Thinking about how Count Olaf would probably say things like “Verifiably Fictitious Disease” and “Vaccine-Forced Deception” and as a result would experience a Virally Fatal Death

swallowing hurts so much I can only sleep for as long as it takes not to swallow

Having a bat’h

I’ve had this covid’s 19th for seven days now and frankly I don’t see the appeal

hearing that Elon Musk just reduced Twitter’s staff to a single employee living in an underground station who has to push a button every 108 minutes to prevent the entire site from exploding

Having some chamomile (rhymes with anomaly) tea

This year, watch out for the mighty Bad King Wenceslas who will tear down your chimney and eat your presents

They shoudl come up with horrifying new vegan meats that have no living reference point

Sick and achy

Might tweet later

Illustration from The Living Forest (1925), by the Canadian painter Arthur Heming who — having been diagnosed with colourblindness as a child — worked for most of his life in a distinctive palette of black, yellow, and white: buff.ly/2xDkmtL

Halfway through shoving all of my soldiers into a giant horse to hide them when one of them tells me it’s supposed to be made of wood

About to fly in an aired plane