my parents, age 25: we're married with kids and we have a mortgage! me, age 25: after i learn this tiktok dance i shall have some shredded cheese for dinner

Rainy days are for fire snacks and good company

I know twitter doesn’t agree on much but at least we can all agree that Honeycrisp is the best apple

#NewProfilePic

Nothing puts ya in check faster than the target self-checkout cameras

Cue the sad tunes playlist

Only spent cash this weekend no card so technically doesn’t count

Believe nothing of what you hear, and only half of what you see

See you at the Fuel Station at 2am iykyk

Anyone else bothered by the fact that if you cut a hole in a net it has less holes than before?

There’s a lot to be said for a PHAT piece of banana bread

Remember concerts? Those were such a swell time

Songs from tik tok live in my head rent free

Your worst mistake is your best advice

La Juas is the capital of Sioux City man don’t @ me

If you don’t pour your glass of wine to the rim wut u doin

When u have to close an eye to send a text u know the night is over

It’s 1am where the time go

Me tweeting for the first time since October of 2020 lol 🫠 Like this tweet if you see it - curious to know who still uses Twitter