A perfect articulation of what's happening at twitter today:

If you're gonna sink a company, I'm not sure you should like, announce it first?

It's about to get real dumb in here.

Deep fakes only! Fool me twice or you're out.

Prediction: Next Elon Musk buys the Simpsons so he can "predict the future".

Daylight savings time is here, which means the darkness has come.

elon has created a system where you can pay $8 to publicly humiliate multibillion-dollar companies, what a time to be alive

people who stand up on airplanes as soon as it lands: "What iz happeninG? I dohn't want to zit in dis boring seat. I want to moove. I need to dance!"

This is what you get when you ask the sports guy to come in to cover a blizzard in the morning show.

Happy New Year! All the best! :D

Two years on HRT

Always look on the bright side of life. Thank you to everyone who sent me this lovely performance by the MozArt Group. #MontyPython

It brings me no pleasure to report this thespectator.com/newsletter/tay…

Hey God, tell your son to put some clothes on. OMG.

Check it out! I wrote dis! 🤓😉😍

Week of Cone RETURNS for halloween. This time, witches adorned with traffic cone hats perform a ritual on a waymo

It's funny that dolphins can't not bellyflop. I am also this majestic. Prove me wrong.

all of quantum physics can be summed up in one word: vibes