RT if you think my Parody Minion account is better than Bob the minion (Parody)

If you see a post on my page that isn’t an absurdist take on the Minions, please just ignore it. I sometimes forget to stay in character as a Minion that has bad behaviors.

Thank you for 9,702 followers!

Should I keep going with my funny Parody Minions posting? Or has it been about enough?

I wish I had never started doing this. It’s made my life so much worse.

I was becoming fairly respected in the weird online comedy community. I was being compared favorably to Goldin and Hentschel. I was being asked to go on podcasts, perform at live shows, etc. And I go and throw it all away for a couple hundred new followers…

My girlfriend and I haven’t had sex in weeks. The last time we did, it was 3 minutes of unenthusiastic pumping and unconvincing moans, all crescendoing to a few pitiful spurts of sperm from my paltry member. She didn’t look at me once during any of it.

I hope Bob the minion (Parody) can fucking forgive me. I didn’t mean to drag him into my bullshit. It’s all drama. I’m fucking over my dumbass life.

James Earl Jones has passed away.

James Earl Jones passed away at 93 years old.

James passed on.

Let me know if James Earl Jones continues to pass away.

A lot of people are unfollowing my Parody Minion account.

All I fucking do is give and give to you people.

I bet you all wish I was never born at all…