I giving the best gifts for couples. At my first wedding invite I gave a battleaxe with a card that read 'for when it comes to blows'. The marriage didn't last. My second wedding invite I gave a sculpture of a demonic imp sitting on a rock with a massive dick. Also didn't last.

Today I was thinking about advertising 30 minute to 1 hour bookings once a month at a reduced rate for quick consultations for those thinking about hiring an investigator for their case - then I remembered that most enquirers don't want to pay anything anyway.

Argh, have come down with something.

I have cancelled leaving the house today. I will stay inside and continue to feel sorry for myself until further notice.

I'm not an American so I kind of find it really weird that someone would pay someone for 'coaching' or 'mentoring'. I mean, yeah, technical workshop on something tangible I get. Everything else just looks like a gift.

Damn, here come the hot and cold sweats.

I hate getting around halfway through a novel (which has high review scores) to realise I just don't have any will to finish it. It's not poorly written, just pedestrian.

I've dragged myself to day one of a 2 day conference. Gah! Still got hot/cold sweats.

Just found out that a company I have done work for for over 7 years has sidelined me for another PI without any consultation or discussion. That's fine, but if they come back to me for any 1-off jobs (for compliance reasons) they won't be getting preferential rates anymore.

I couldn't handle a full first day at conference. Hopefully tomorrow.

I'm cold. I'm hot. I'm cold. I'm hot. I'm cold. I'm hot. I'm both hot and cold at same time.

Didn't make it to the second day of conference. Money well spent.

So, watched the last episode of The Furry Detectives. Why did they put English subtitles on when the Australians were speaking? In English.

I think I offended a would-be client with a 'quick job' by telling her that it was a 2-hour minimum billing. If I have to go out at 10pm on a Saturday night to do your 'quick job' you're paying for the inconvenience.

Just found a dead person. No, I didn't stumble on a body, client needed a death record but had erroneous info (wrong date of birth, wrong year of death etc) so no records found. Old adage still holds true: garbage in, garbage out.

Anyone else being deluged with those send-us-your-product-list-by-this-totally-not-bogus-whatsapp-link emails?

Trying to do that 'work on your business' thing today. Which largely means looking at cat videos on the internet and stuff.

Dealing with potential client's expectations today. I think there is already a problem and we haven't even started yet.

Just let a bunch of clients who send me ongoing work that my preferential rates are going up as of next month. No complaints as yet, probably because they realise it's been 4 or 5 years since I last raised them.

In my experience any would-be clients who are unannounced walk-ins are invariably batshit.