Excuse you, I know who Danny Devito is

This shit is just too much sometimes

No sweater I buy will fit me better than the ones I steal from my mom’s closet

It pays to be nice yall. My doordasher dropped my $1 soda and I said no worries and still tipped and rated 5 stars. They went all the way back to get me another soda AND got me a cookie

!!!!!!!!

Any gamer boys out there wanna get me a set to add to my gamer girl setup??

Sometimes I sit in my living room and remember that it’s my living room and not just a room I live in

Kai’s favorite part of the day is when I come home. Not because he missed me but because he gets access to the bedroom again

I never heard of uncle kracker until that one viral vine, and it has taken up until recently for me to discover he is a musician. I just thought that he was that kids uncle who they called kracker

Goddamn someone needs to ban me from spending money

I should’ve known my day wasn’t gonna be great when my first sip of Diet Coke was flat

I had my double root canal yesterday morning and my mouth just feels so disgusting

What’s the appropriate response to finding out you’re financially screwed for a long while

I can’t stand how it’s the people who never do their jobs to standard that are always the first ones to jump and point out the single mistake you make

she is the moment

He’s a 10 but he hits you with that “hell yeah brother” when he’s balls deep

No one can (make me cry) like Noah Kahan

The best bonding moments happen in the bathroom

sleepy stitch 🎀