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Cute lil throwback to when I had hair and did stupid characters to near silence xx

This girl is way too young to be on a dating app, let alone raising a dog

Hate my mechanic's tone, as if I'm stupid for not knowing the things he's paid to know "Your brake pads are worn down to the metal" so? Is that bad? Just make it go, charge me some random amount and give it back, car nerd

My mate's a backseat driver. He doesn't offer advice or anything, he just has extremely long arms and legs

Gavin and Stacey is the Coldplay of sitcoms

I got my first pubes when I was 7. I said, "why are you giving me these?" But he just smiled and told me to go back to sleep

This tweet didn't slap so just making sure everyone's picturing it right

I don't think I'll ever go full veggie because I don't respect birds I look into the eyes of a cow, or a pig, and I see such depth, such a capacity to feel Chickens though? They creep me out if anything. I'll eat them and their eggs, no hesitation, I don't give a shit

I can't stop looking at my phone and it's ruining my life

But can you blame me?? 😝😝😝 WHAT A PHONE!!

Declan Rice not celebrating because he used to be Irish, much respect 🙌🍀🙌

Don't knock it until you've tried it, unless it's a bathroom door, then do the opposite

I swim with sharks every time I go in the sea As long as it doesn't matter how close the sharks are

Bit of fun

London's finest comics are back to bring you lots of laughs this Tuesday! 😍🔥 @VinnyShiu Alfie Packham Becky Umbers Alex Kitson Andy Field

Everyone's got an alcoholic drink they can't hack any more because they had too much of it when they were a kid. That's how I feel about colouring in. I just went too hard and burnt myself out. I genuinely don't like it anymore

Dave Grohl is so multitalented it's crazy. Drums, guitar, cheating on his wife, vocals, he can do it all

I feel like Chapel Roan is body shaming me because I am definitely too tall to eat anyone out while knee deep in the passenger seat. Best case scenario I can lick their stomach but even then my neck is screaming and I don't even know where my feet are