Me: Oh I can’t wait to sleep in today! My fucking brain: HEY it’s 7 am WAKE UP

#WearAMask (You’ll Be Back from Hamilton Parody) Pls don’t sue me Lin-Manuel Miranda ily and and just want us all to get back to work. And also for less people to die 🖤 #HamiltonFilm #jonathangroff

“Andie’s parking and turning into things is the equivalent of sucking in when you take a photo” 🤣

Dis bitch over here “I wish I was allergic to something normal like peanuts” “What ARE you allergic too?” “Icy hot”

*Looking up how to become an ordained minister online* “Free, quick, easy, and legal. I like all those words”

Girl in class who recently dyed hair ginger: We know I don’t have a soul Taylor: You didn’t have a soul when you were blonde 🤣

My teacher fighting us on why she can tell us “no” but not her clients “Don’t blame me for capitalism.” 😂

*talking to friend about tinder* “Wonder bread has more personality than men in Florida” 🤣🤣🤣

The three types of Florida men 1) HoldsFish 2) Raves 3) Military/country boi

Quotes from Alyssa: “Why is this tea spicy?” “That’s Dr. Pepper”

5 y/o: *trying to put on new shoes that are zip tied together* Me: We have to wait till we stop to get scissors ~5 min later~ 5 y/o: Mom look! Mom: I can’t I’m driving Me: Did you put your shoes on even though they’re still connected? 5 y/o: yeah…

Me: Why is Florence Pugh so hot 😭 Roomie: Global warming….idk Roomie: You said Florida right?

My mother to my father: Did you just microwave your pizza? My father: yep My mother: Please don’t tell people you’re from New Jersey

“I need a 3 day weekend and a line of cocaine” my coworker standing innocently behind me: *dying*

THE FULL HAMILTON TEN YEAR REUNION PERFORMANCE!!!! #Hamilten #TonyAwards

My Twitter feed if just Biphobia ft Billie Eilish, LA and ICE and the Tony’s……2025 what are you…

Literally I gasped so loud when he popped on the screen 😅

TS12 before HS4 is hilarious