Dear Websites: If your website doesn't include prices for your services - or under prices it says "call us" I'll just find another website.

Me: Woo-hoo! My kiddo's going to stay the night at a friend's! I get the house all to myself! Me just 20 min after kid leaves : The house is too quiet, I miss him 😓 🤷‍♀️ #momlife #singleMom

I honestly think my dream job involves me running my own company - so no. Not yet 🙂

Parents whose kids will eat anything: is life as magical as it sounds? #parents #momlife

If you're hiring entry-level developers (without professional coding exp), please respond to this thread with the job posting/your contact information, and in what locations you're willing to hire (city, remote, US-remote, EU-remote, etc)! If you're not, please RT for reach!

in *good* news at work… my team's expansion got approved and i'm looking to hire a LOT of people to work on twilio Studio — frontend and backend tech leads and managers, and senior devs and SDETs for both teams. DMs are open if you're interested!

Sending SO MUCH love and support to punk rock rubber duckies everywhere. You got this.♥️

If I had a nickel for every time a politician lied about setting zebras free.....

I’m hiring a Jr. Designer. - There are no design exercises. - There are no presentations in front of 40 people, 38 of whom don’t understand design. - There are no trick questions. Just a process with people you may work with. That’s all.

If someone is flirting with me I need them to literally say “I’m flirting with you” or else I’m just like wow they’re nice

One of the hardest parts of parenting is when your tearful child shows you their favourite toy, broken in their hands, and they look to you with bottomless hope, waiting for you to work your magic and fix it. You try and somehow, against all odds, you manage to break it even more

A lot of being an adult is taking containers that came with one thing in them and using them to store another, different thing

Me: foolishly spends $30 on cat toys Cat: Disdainfully ignores all cat toys and spends days playing with a pen cap

don’t forget to pee after sex or you’ll get an NFT

You have to be a special kind of d-bag to ghost on your company, go buy a sail boat, lay off your employees via Slack with no severance. Then jump on Twitter to gloat about the sale of the company less than 2 months later😔 Ryan Carson Treehouse | Learn to code with us! #TechBro x.com/ryancarson/sta…

Maine is being hammered by COVID. It’s most -prevalent in areas where there are large numbers of unvaccinated people. What’s it going to take to convince you guys?

What doesn't kill you mutates and tries again.

They say we can have a gathering of up to eight people without issues. I don't even know eight people without issues.

I literally lose my mind when people misuse the word "literally".