The way the list gets longer by the day god damn 😮‍💨

This is still funny as fuck btw

mid life crisis ? no no, mid DAY crisis. something happens every day

My dumbass 20 yr old coworker thinks I hate him, no homie I hate your attitude and your work ethic 😭😭 you’ve been here for a month and you know fuck all don’t get offended if I’m curt with you bc I’m not gunna let you think you can coast on having no skills 😮‍💨

i love the smell of someone burning their last bridge with me

Realllll

Whenever people can’t read my handwriting at work I tell them it’s not for them, that about sums me up

Oh he don’t me, I’m even more hateful and callous outdoors

Damn they should get him to play at the grand final or something

My life is like Sex and the City but with no sex and it’s the suburbs

I like going for walks 🙂

I like going for walks 🙂

Sorry I didn’t text back, I had writers block

Unnecessary design aka personality

Fr though I wonder how much money you could get from him after he punches you in the face for calling him Lebanese 😈

Eh some people are better lays than they are friends or whatever

Got paid yesterday. Paid my bills & outstanding debts. Broke again within an hour. Amazing! Adulting is just amazing!