My dad: "What the hell is wrong with Big Bird?! Is he moulting?!" Me: "He's wearing a raincoat." #MacysParade

They really got The Temptations on a Wonder Bread float? The carbohydrate analogy for Whiteness?! #MacysParade

Today I learned that my father thought the lyrics were "Who lives in a pineapple under a tree?!" #Spongebob #MacysParade

I think I have convinced my dad that "T-Pain" is short for "Thomas Paine," and that he picked the nickname because it was "Common Sense." Hope this sticks. #MacysParade

The "Radio City Rocketti" are the Little Italy version of the high-kicking dancers. #MacysParade

Actually, Hoda, it's pronounced "ricotta." #MacysParade

My dad: "I'm not sure I'm gonna make it through three hours of Tony Romo. This is supposed to be a holiday" #Thanksgiving2024 #BearsvLions

One of my favorite things about being home for #Thanksgiving is my father explaining the quirks of the living room fan, which they've had since I was three.

OK but like, did Charlie Brown actually SEND any Christmas cards? He's real salty about not receiving any, but I think he'll find he's part of the problem here. #ACharlieBrownChristmas

I usually don't just take a loose pill that somebody hands me, but hey, it's the holidays. Also the dealer is my mother and she says it's for my allergies.

We discussed the Bechdel Test in my Women and Power class today. My female-identifying students agreed that passing it is a step in the right direction, but also a laughably low bar. My male-identifying students agreed that "not every movie needs women characters."

If I had a nickel for each time a student email addressed me as "Mrs. Hoskins," despite never having indicated to my students in any way that I was married, there would be no pay gap between me and my completely fictional husband.

The amount of incense in this church is, frank(incense)ly chemical warfare.

[Slips a fiver into the poinsettia on the church organist's lid; whispers:] "Let's pick up that tempo, hey?"

Police officer: "So you think stealing Elton John's identity is amusing, do ya?" Me, wearing oversized glasses and feather lapels on a velvet suit: "It's a little bit funny..."

My father: "I don't mind them singing in Spanish, but I wish they had the words in English at the bottom of the screen." Also my father: *can niether understand lyrics sung in English, nor find subtitles large enough to read* #MacysParade #MacysThanksgivingParade

When did Elmo dye his fur purple? #MacysParade #MacysThanksgivingParade

My final, unplanned, Christmas gift to my parents today was signing into my accounts on their TV so my dad could watch his fantasy NFL players disappoint him.

Hungry Hungry Hippos is so high stakes. Every game is for all the marbles.

Sorry, Britt Prince: there's only one Headband Queen in Carver-Hawkeye! Iowa Women's Basketball