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I love that kid. Dumb as a stump, but I love him.

And when I say brother, I don't mean, like, an actual brother, but I mean it like the way black people use it.

So I became...What? Bulimic. You can read minds?

A eugoogalizor, one who speaks at funerals. Or did you think I'd be too stupid to know what a eugoogoly was?

MAGNUM!

Wait a minute. I know that hand. It was in the fall Bulova watch catalog.

What are you gonna do? Screw him! Hold out for more! That's what I'm talking about!

Have you ever wondered if there was more to life, other than being really, really, ridiculously good looking?

Your work...in the winter International Male catalog...made me want to be a model. I freakin' worship you, man.

I'm pretty sure there's more to life than being really, really ridiculously good looking, and I plan on finding out what that is

You think that you're too cool for school, but I have a newsflash for you, Walter Cronkite... you aren't.

Wait a minute. I might just have an idea. They'll be looking for us at Maury's right? But they won't be looking for... not us.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have an after-funeral party to attend.

I can Dere-lick my own balls, thank you very much.

I invented the piano key neck tie! I invented it! What have you done, Derek? Nothing!

The designer's got your nuts in a vise...offering you ten million plus three percent...of every pair of underwear sold.

Wait a minute. I know that hand. It was in the fall Bulova watch catalog.

You think that you're too cool for school, but I have a newsflash for you, Walter Cronkite... you aren't.

What is this? A center for ants?

I'm done,Jaco. I got a prostate the size of a honeydew...and a head full of bad memories.