I don't always watch tennis, but when I do I'm so intrigued by the ball retrievers that I sometimes forget to watch the actual points

Hi, I'm here to inform everyone that the Indians are now 4 games behind the Twins.

Can't decide what bugs me more. When people use you're instead of your, because they at least tried but they are completely wrong. Or the other way around because they can pawn it off as a complete lack of effort rather than pure ignorance.

2,800 days since Michigan's last win over Ohio State in football. #OhioState

"The Rays will also receive $250,000 in international slot money from Cleveland." That's good, we don't want to be wasting our time sitting around at Canadian casinos when we could be out there winning games.

In general I would say I'm a proponent of chatting at work about nonsense, but if I'm still there after 5 on a Friday that's not the time for chatter

The michigan ROTC guys rooting for Army says everything

HISTORY!

Who wore it better? All I'm saying is at least my mustache was real #RonSwanson Nick Offerman @parksandrecnbc

I wish I tweeted more because it's funny to go back and read them. But in another, much more real sense I wish I tweeted less because it's a waste of time

Didn't run but still had a blast at the #Columbus Hot Chocolate Run with @anselnalin. We got our 15 seconds of fame as the #HotChocolateSignGuys

When someone in the stall next to you sneezes, it takes a large amount of self control not to "bless" them