Oh, you're a DJ? You must be so good at pressing buttons on your laptop.

You drink alcohol? That is so rebellious considering you're under the age of 21.

So, you're an Atheist? Please debate me for hours about the Bible you've never actually read.

You like Tyler the Creator? You have wonderful taste in music.

I'm so thrilled there is a Jehovah Witness at my door.

You were born in the nineties? Please tell me about the old days.

You're a bored 18 year old high school senior & it's 3 in the morning? You should message random girls on Facebook & see if you can get dome

Taylorgang or die, you say? I choose death.

You don't know the lyrics to this song? Please sing gibberish as loud as you can.

You don't believe in Big Foot? What if I told you he'll send you to hell if you don't believe in him.

You know all the lyrics to this song? Please sing them as loud as you can.

Oh, you're an actor? Why don't you act like a waiter and refill my cup.

Yes, I would love to see you do a card trick.

Birth Control doesn't always work, you say? Your parents probably know a lot about that.

You have finals coming up? I bet you're using your time wisely.

You're 18 and already engaged? You must be really mature for your age.

Your profile picture is you smoking weed? I bet you have a very respectable and high paying job.

You wrote cute sayings and let your friends sign their name all over your blue jeans. I'm surprised your mother let you do that.

The fact that you say "fuck" between every word makes me really respect you. I'm sure a lot of parents want you to babysit their kids.

I love that you wear ugg boots with shorts. That's so cute.