I need dom in the pit.

I need Top 99.9% of Tweeters Twitter fingers out tonight

me: any medical problems? patient: no me: ok any meds? patient: lisinopril, Ativan, levothyroxine, sertraline, oxycodone

Something about watches, but also, it should be a crime that no one has had this man's babies.

Please pray for John Mayer’s left index finger!

Send me the log in!

This is a power move

John Mayer is at Citi Field tonight!

A true day in the life 1st and 2nd year is waking up up whenever, staring at ur laptop till you go to sleep, then repeat. Weekend nights hang with friends. Repeat for 2 years (throw in the occasional mandatory activity)

We need a touch tunes wrapped NOW

Just heard from McDonald’s CEO the snack wrap will be back in 2025!!

THEY LISTENED

People who hate on John Mayer are trapped in a 2017 culture wars time warp. The dude is the most talented male artist of the past two decades—with no peers in terms of his work as a vocalist, guitarist, and balladeer. He’d be Drake if he didn’t get canceled like 11 times lol

I actually think a golf slice is more impressive than a straight ball, like curving the ball in any other sport is god mode

Josh Allen recovering instantly from a funny bone injury he’s BILLT DIFFERENT

Jay Cutler lost to Ronnie Coleman in 4 consecutive Mr Olympias before beating him in the final two. #billsmafia

I actually love this Ashton Hall guy he’s a TANK 🔥🔥

By the time I recognize this moment, this moment will be gone - John Mayer

“How many times have you watched this?” Me: yes

You’re allergic to cats brother. Or her laundry detergent