There's something wrong with how we function as a society when 'minimum wage' is synonymous with 'starting pay' for non-entry-level positions.

Anyways, I'm still unemployed.

If a guy wears a sleeveless undershirt but isn't married, does that make it just a girlfriend beater?

I would watch more movies if there weren't so many re-makes, sequels, prequels, spin-offs, revivals, and 'in the same world' stories.

Wake me up when the entertainment monopolies get taken apart.

Rules of Bad TV Writing #534:
If a single episode takes place at a hospital, a main character must declare, 'I hate hospitals.'

Ever think you're having an existential crisis but it turns out your blood sugar is just low?

Just got the living daylights scared out of me because someone from my landlady's open house opened my front door while I was changing clothes.

I think I sprouted grey hair.

That was a fun #earthquake just now. 4.7 off Malibu!

The more you complain about LA, the more LA you are.

I sent out 43 job applications today but the one I want the most would be working for The Magic Castle

I wish there had been an option to upload a cover letter because it would just be pages of me gushing over how much I love magic, despite not being a magician. 🤞✨

DRUNKEN PEASANTS 10-YEAR ANNIVERSARY - 10-HOURS CELEBRATION STREAM - GUESTS & NOSTALGIA | 1290
youtube.com/watch?v=b1-Ydm…

Billy the Fridge Steve Harvey Oswald (Big Cat Scott Henson) 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐃𝐀𝐘 💣
Minx 🏳️‍⚧️ Ghastly 👻 ⚡PhatPat⚡ So Fain Mint | Daily Reviews Until Oct 17th! EmmyPhere

Just completed my final legal secretary exam and got 94/100!!! I'm officially done with the program!!
SOMEBODY HIRE ME PLEASE

You know how I know ghosts aren't real?

For years I thought my dad's house was haunted and swore I could hear something moving up and down the stairs when I was home alone.

Turns out there was a false back to the closet under the stairs where my dad grew weed.

They were giving out free cookie kits at Trader Joe's and when the gal asked me if I wanted one, I said,
'No, thank you. I live alone.'

I can never go back.

I got fired yesterday. Who fires people on a Monday?
I guess my boss figured out she could pay someone less to do my job.
Anyone need a writer or a legal secretary?

Can I have a boyfriend for Christmas?
I promise I'll feed him and pet him and remember to take him outside.

The world of NFT’s has been stale and boring as of late with few exception. Right here is an exception. Give this thread a read and look at the uniqueness and eye popping visuals.

🤦‍♀️ buddy I just wanna eat

Anybody else avoid being on the internet so you don't have to worry as much about things completely out of your control?

I'm starting a legal secretary training course this week and I'm so pumped. First step towards a much brighter future.
Writing might be the passion, but I can't write if I can't eat.

Wish me luck, y'all 🤞

This hurricane was as lackluster as my last date, except in terms of inches, and unfortunately he didn't have as much of a downpour.

#HurricaneHilary