In alcohol's defense, i've done some pretty dumb shit while completely sober too.

If you get caught Sleeping at work, no worries, just slowly raise your head up and say "In Jesus name, Amen."

"KENDRICK LAMARSHMELLOW" "R BELLY " "LIL WANGZ" "CHIEF BEEF" "RICK ROLLS"

do you ever eat so much you feel like ur gonna die but then keep eating

when it’s mothers day but the streets raised you

Fellas u put the toilet seat down for her but ask yourself, when has she left it up for u? Know. Your. Worth.