Sometimes when I'm bored... I come here to read over my tweets and laugh at my incredibly dry humour.

Not everyone is as heartless as you, Pie Crust. x.com/OdiousCannibal…

Are those the ends of a butternut squash? x.com/WankMyWoody/st…

My jaw is still sharp enough to slice cheese on. x.com/OdiousCannibal…

#NewProfilePic

Trying to tweet my porno but it's taking... [Jabbing at the keys on this phone.] ...forever.

Is that your way of telling me I look delicious? x.com/OdiousCannibal…

I've got a list of pick-up lines to try out.

I see drama. Don't stop. I'll just go grab my cotton candy.

People won't get my dry humour. x.com/CaptivatingLus…

Can you gist me with what's going on? x.com/CaptivatingLus…

Spent ten minutes trying to follow myself but Twitter won't allow it. Talk about selfish.

Dear, Amara.. x.com/MindsConsole/s…

I just came to say Merry New Year 2019. And congrats to myself for becoming Godfather of ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ and J. Teller ~ Legacy's tot.

Now do you understand my dilemma?