Endless grind got you down? Suffering and toil leaving you exhausted? Relax with a cold, refreshing Blue Stripe! Mmm, Blue Stripe! The taste preferred by American workers!

The Pound of Flesh* special is back at all participating O'Tolley's locations! Demand your Pound of Flesh* today! *weight pre-cooking; Flesh may include skin, cartilage, bone fragments, and/or organ meat. Quantities limited by FDA regulation where applicable

This is happening a lot lately… #werewolftheapocalypse #worldofdarkness

We have such lunchables to show you

Mark Q | Mondo Cane Remember to drop by your local Magadon distributor this Halloween to participate in our Bobbing for Healthcare event! Every participant gets a free grab bag of pill samples!

This data definitely not courtesy of the tracking chips implanted in lycanthropes as part of a catch and release and exterminate strategy.

Attention: Joe and his band WURM TAYNT will be performing in the break room from 5:30 to 7. Refreshments will be served, BYO splash guards and eye protection.

The employee health fair is coming up! Register now for exciting events like Pin the Needle on the Patient, Whose Kidney Is This, and our always popular DIY Heart Surgery For Dummies seminar!

ATTENTION! All employees, please review the attached informational brief regarding the evolution of the lycanthrope threat.

We're pleased that Operation Twaint has been a great success. Now that the Wyrm Itself owns Twitter, we expect Bane possessions to double with the coming influx of hate and vitriol!

Climate change is a lie by big Garou to sell more werewolves

Ethically speaking, we are far superior to Elon by every measure. Even the werewolves prefer us.

We might own a stake in nearly every politician on the ballot but we're still nice enough to let you pick which one you prefer. Go vote!

Magadon Pharmaceutical study # G-44-09 has been placed on hold due to unexpected [REDACTED]. If you are approached by any researcher who took part in this study group, please return them to Containment.

The baseless rumor that Elon works for us is just that. We have never employed him. We have standards.

Happy #Pride! The LGTQBAI2SGQ+ community matters to us! You can count on our support so long as it's politically convenient!

We're pleased to announce that reservations for our gender reveal drone strikes are open! Announce your little one in style with a pink or blue hellfire missile fired from a real MQ-1 Predator and livestreamed straight to you. Slots are limited, book today!