i have no time in my life for pizza that isn’t as good cold as it is hot

THIS DOG just walked up to me and spit a spider she’d caught into my lap. In other news, dog free to a good home.

y’all last night i had a dream there was a spider stuck on my face and i woke up in a panic and it was just my hair had come out of my little sleep bun so im shaving my head today obvs

v excited to test the limits of how much i've been crushing therapy lately - we had to cancel today so ANYTHING COULD HAPPEN

if you've ever wondered what it's like to live with a dog, Pip was in the other room and i burped and she ran out and started barking at the patio like there was an intruder.

computer why are men

i've got a fresh cup of tea and an almond croissant and i'm ready to fight the patriarchy

not feeling too hot so canceling plans and we’ll do a wee stream around 10:30ishC - so about an hour wooooooo

dresspheres were genius i will die on this hill

judging by her reaction to the monthly tornado siren checks, Pip will be an absolutely feral attack dog in an apocalypse situation

hot take: microsoft teams is literally the worst. how is it so bad do they not know how people use things

pip has been extra squirrelly today so i just exasperatedly was like "why don't you go see what the bluejays outside are pissed about" and she ran to the patio door and barked and i choose to believe that is not coincidence but instead a sign of her genius

non-summer weather is BULLSHIT i just had to go get socks burn it all down

one of the benefits of having a dog no one really talks about is when you have cramps and you get your heating pad and your almost 50-pound dog happily lays across it and you.

been watching too much Letterkenny. just sang "TO BE FAAAAIIIRRR" in a meeting.

the hubris it takes to sign emails with "warmest regards" or "best" like excuse me how do you know your regards are the warmest or that you wish me the best out of every single other person i know