I didn’t wear these really cute shoes only for you to ask me to take them off before stepping into your house

Interrupting is a sign of interest

If you own loros you’re a trend follower. And for the love of god I hope you’re not actually calling them loros

gym was empty today. glad we starting the year off with honesty

*Bombs Venezuela*

glad i didn’t really waste any time studying international law seeing as how it is fake and meaningless

the real pandemic was when everyone was reading the subtle art of not giving a fuck

so the dictator from venezuela is going to the same jail as diddy and luigi like is this a reality show jail

why is it easier to lock in on a book you randomly picked up than the book you've been planning to read since forever

dudes be 27 saying “what’s the move tonight” bro go buy property in venezuela

telling my boss I can’t come back to work because I’ve discovered the joy of doing nothing

unfortunately my politics are rooted in a deep love for humanity and the exhausting belief that a new world is possible

“oxford comma is a big sign of ai” you can pry the oxford comma out of my cold dead hands idc i will never stop using her

sorry i can't come in to work today im scared

i wish you could microdose employment like i love having a job but only for 1 month at a time

Deleting WhatsApp means going no contact with every immigrant you know

yeah im chronically online but im also chronically outside how many of you can say the same

sometimes i struggle to adjust to civilian life after coming home from the movies