This counts, right?

For so many reasons... 👌🏻

Hey girl, are you a blood soaked army horse?

Cause you've been running through my mind all day 😏 also you seem extremely distressed

Google memories coughed up when I dyed my hair orange during lockdown to more accurately portray a flame haired busty barmaid in an online zoom murder mystery game with my friends 🤣 Such dedication.

Not quite the same but the police station I got dragged to when I skipped out of boarding school & witnessed an attempted murder has been bought BY the school now, & they hired a lad I knew to renovate it, and he had to quietly paint over his own graffiti from his wayward youth.

Had two clients in today who are nurses - best believe I've grilled them on why my legs feel fizzy and like they might FALL OFF. Turns out it's more 'you're getting quite old now, could be weird perimenopausal shit' and not 'an imminent hideous death'.

So that's... good?!

3 degrees? I'm sorry this weather is useless. However, the sun is also out so I gotta do it! Shorts and big coat it is!

Absolutely loving Fallout, which is not what I expected AT ALL. Limiting myself to one a day as very close to the end now.

Would also accept an unblocking and normal human conversation 🤣🤷🏻‍♀️

Go on, have a guess what this is in response to.

I am a woman of simple pleasures...

When people tell me my local area has no culture, I shall show them this

anyone that watched Baby Reindeer and afterwards thought “oh let me try and find this woman on social media and engage with her context” is tapped

No one else picking up on the irony that you're all stalking HER now? #BabyReindeer

Having banged it all out over two nights when it first came out, now watching everyone post their opinions one or two episodes into Baby Reindeer? 😬 None of those tweets will age well!

Christ - I've had THE FEAR today in place of a hangover. Absolutely wildly paranoid about absolutely everything. Slight knock on the door? BURGLARS! New tattoo is a normal amount of red? INFECTION! Friend didn't reply to last msg? SHE HATES ME! Early night required.

Well. Absolutely thrilled I can still do 12+ hours of solid drinking at my big age!

Feel absolutely fine today altho fully aware I'm gonna probably need a mega nap at like 2pm 👇🏻

Just remembered getting cross at Glory Holes night because they didn't have any 'Sinking Putts and Smashing Sluts' T Shirts left and I really wanted one. 'Well you shouldn't still have them up on display, tempting people, should you?' 🤦🏻‍♀️

I take it back. It was great!