Never mind favorite day

I just turned 40. There are a lot of things I wish I’d known growing up. You can learn from my mistakes. If you’re 20-something, read this:

I do not care about the discourse but there is absolutely no way this is a real human being

Why take drugs when you can just have a Diet Pepsi ?

Dippin a hot dog into Tempe Town Lake and dying instantly

Just heard High Hopes on the radio. Angry with Brenden Urie again

This is a Nathan For You bit but instead of being put on a sex offender registry he goes to prison for manslaughter if he fails

RIP Andrew Tate, I drew this picture in remembrance of him

I am more correct than you I am sorry

OOO CONTENT IS GOING TO BE COOKING ON TWITTER DOT COM THIS WEEK

Imagine getting dunked on this hard and posting it as if you’re in the right

To all who celebrate

Bluesky username secured

Excited to go !! see new Freddy Fatbear movie

X is running an ad for an app that’s literally just a video of real animals being shot

I recreated the mccartney album cover when I was 15