How did my set go tonight? After the show a stripper commended me on a strip club joke I did and handed ME a bunch of ones as a tip. That was a first.

They say not all heroes wear capes BUT every homeless guy that has solicited money from me at this Burger King has worn one.

4 years ago, I appeared on the Travel Channel in a show about thrill rides. It aired for one week until they decided to become a paranormal network instead.

When you were deader inside than you realized and the person that is currently making you feel alive again is probably gonna leave you heartbroken through no real fault of their own (the situation) but you say fuck it, because it feels so good to actually feel something.

I just dropped an NFT. Non Flushable Turd.

I've started a conspiracy theory group that specifically discusses theories surrounding smoked meats. It's called Bar-Be-Qanon

I had the pleasure to kick off the Theo Von show last night in my hometown, Jacksonville, FL for 1,000 people. 🔥 show, his openers Maddy Smith and Ari Mannis crushed too. And his fans showed SO much love! Thank you for that opportunity Rat King!

I spent the entire Valentine's weekend with an awesome lady eating at cool eateries and thrift shopping, and I just headlined a sold out show in North Carolina actually on Valentine's Day. This is my favorite V Day possibly ever! I'm also the happiest I've been in awhile.

This month has been WILD so far! So far performed for 2,000 people in my hometown, performed on a nudity laden drag show, got a noise complaint from a hotel for banging too loud, and headlined a Valentine's Day show in the same NC town that went viral on Tik Tok.

I love Peacemaker on HBO Max and I've been blasting the soundtrack this entire weekend!

Gas prices are so high, that I'm thinking of entering a strip club with a few gas cards and all these accrued fuel rewards points and balling the fuck out!

Porn for the hearing impaired is called Closed Faptioning.

My birthday is today. It's also International Women's Day. Makes sense because I really enjoy when women come first.

If I know anything about a subject I rarely share it. Unless, specifically asked, then I unleash that information. I guess you can say I'm a knower, not a shower.

Had an amazing time at the #floridarenaissancefestival.

When you have someone work a full day of work then drive 3+ hours to see you promptly afterwards. Then, you proceed to have an amazing weekend with them. My heart is very very happy. Sometimes it's good to just enjoy the small things in life.

#Oscars #WillSmith #chrisrock

That's what you call a PUNCHline! #Oscars #WillSmith #ChrisRock

Chris ROCKED #Oscars #WillSmith #ChrisRock

I am Forrest Gump.