Childish. This is why I didn’t tell you about the pregnancy.

I’m going to hold a tournament for people who want to be the father of my unborn baby.

It’s working for that one girl

Don’t you have a bunch of other peoples boyfriends and baby daddy’s on your list? 😒 Chill.

I’m just kidding. I’m too busy for a baby daddy. 💅🏻

Thought you said it wasn’t even your baby 🤨

I’m a total bookworm. I once read like 6 books in a year which is just insane and incredibly impressive.

Role. Roll. Whatever.

THIS IS CHILD ABUSE.

I’m glad your sister is dead.

Rot in pieces. 💜

Might fuck around and pay for the legal defense of the person who allegedly hit Faith Savell with their car.

I smell like spit up and exhaustion.

The baby is babying. It’s giving four month sleep regression. It’s giving peak spit up.

🤨

The reason why men’s shirts have those tiny pockets is in case their gf turns into a worm

We are the dinosaurs marching marching We are the dinosaurs we make the earth flat

Dudes who have Twitters give me the ick. Like why do you need to be social? Stop.

It annoys me that I can’t see which hoes are liking his pics anymore because I want to be toxic gdi