Oh shut your dirty ass up

A man tweeted this yesterday and then started selling monkeys 😭😭😭😭 what’s wrong with this app???😭

Ppl on Twitter: if you look at the left corner of his eye the iris diverges and also the light pattern is not consistent. This is AI.

Ppl on Facebook after seeing a pitbull praying at church with wings: Amen 🙏 how do you train your dog to do this send advise 🕊

But this encapsulates the typical Nigerian Christian.

Fruit in England is disgusting and the quality is getting worse.

meanwhile, me and my man wan use ‘wetin we go chop like this’ kill ourselves everyday 😭

“what age do you plan on dying?” which kind talking stage be this one💔 why my own things always dey different fgs

Embarrassment is the cost of entry. If you aren't willing to look like a foolish beginner, you'll never become a graceful master.

10 more years of being a baby girl 😌

A dating app for people who suck at flirting called Fumble

Hahah found the email.

£25 charge every time this landlord has to respond to her tenant complaining about mould.

You couldn't make it up.

One of the worst things about human life is that every 18 months you have to call Sky and pretend that you're going to leave them until they find a magical offer which halves your bill which apparently didn't exist when you first rang

I don’t get how you guys just rack up tickets. Don’t you care about wasting money and potential ccjs?

One time in undergrad I put off writing a paper until the day it was due and I woke up at 4 am and wrote 15 pages in one sitting, and it turned out totally fine and I got good feedback. It's the worst thing that ever happened to me and I wish I could go back in time and undo it

I’d steal before I ask a man for money. I’m being so fr.

Remember to always share their joy. They’re more than just numbers and names you see on a list. They’re fighting to stay alive and still have time to celebrate and smile

On 06.04.2024, our world shattered with the tragic loss of my cousin, Kennedi Westcarr-Sabaroche, aged 25.

Please retweet/share so that we can help to raise/support her daughter and honour her legacy 🕊️💚

gofund.me/d6e2e93e

A girl recently told me “guys love to show you a video” and now she will never get a video out of me. She messed up. I have so many videos

imagine going through your first breakup and you have to join a Teams meeting in 7 minutes