Yeah, I'll prob wait until I'm not on work VPN to google that. ;)

Have I told you lately that I love you? No? I should probably send you "A Major Award!"

Chef just called a contestant's bread a "Dense Loaf" and now I know what my ex's rap name would have been.

if I start to whimper about how wet I am, please remember it’s 2020 so I’m probably only talking about what my breath is doing to my mask

Happy Mother's Day!

Top 1% get all the toppings!

Will, you're going to get kicked off the White House staff if you keep this up!

I sure could go for some of them biscuits and mustard, umph.

Are you sure? Seems like an all-natural laxative.

BoobQuake, OK has a nice ring to it also. #BackInTheDay

Because nothing says "romance" like spam!

O.M.G.! What if this made a real palindrome!? It's still fabulous!

LOL...I can see my epitaph: "If this bed's a rockin', don't bury my ass in an underground shelter assuming there's an earthquake!"

They have a death wish. Hoping some serial killer will see them and put them out of their misery.

LOL, does he use Windex?

Stay at home orders are testing marriages. "Are you really the person I want to grow fat with?"

Wanted to have all my smart friends come up with more imaginative conspiracy theories, but then I realized there are peeps who would actually believe them.

Having to mute or delete peeps whose feeds are now one-sided punches in the face. Twas a time when we could have a convo. No mas. :{

I know. I'd hoped that whole, "cleaning up after the scene of the crime" thing would be a bonus.

I'm so sorry for your loss.