you asked for this...

who the fuck let you two hit that gave you a child because I am in shock at the moment Luke Cloud Cygnus Gwydion

NAH NAH NAH NAH NAH I'M BUSTING THROUGH STORYLINE PLOT HOLES LIKE A 4TH WALL BUILT WITH PLYWOOD. YOU GUYS AREN'T GETTING OUT OF IT THIS EASY. I NEED BIRTH CERTIFICATES ON MY DESK PRONTO.

(I haven't gotten a single notification since I logged back into this account because lmao this fucking app my bad if I'm missing anything at all)

MY WIFE??? RENAE MARTELL METEORO. YEAH BUDDY, I CAME: PREPARED AND LITERALLY.

SPIT IT OUT. YOU'RE NOT GETTING OUT OF IT THIS EASY

Apparently you weren't able to get out at all and that's what got you a kid but semantics.

THE MOTHER'S SIGNATURE IS IN CURSIVE CHICKEN SCRATCH HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO READ THIS-- GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE LUCAS CLOUD.

Okay what's the plan here. I forgot what I was going to do. Am I back in with White Eclipse? Did I ever leave? Can someone with a better grasp of reality tell me what the actual hell is going on here anymore? There's gotta be a book or directory somewhere around this realm.....

Of course, sweetheart. Let me just take some funds out of your inheritance account and we can go.

I know, I'm rather good at this "dad" thing, wouldn't you agree???

You were the cause of 97% of all your own drama!

Is it your primary objective to get me to crash out today or what? 😂😂😂

Maybe if you rethought that request in a different, more enticing wording, we wouldn't be standing here talking about your dwindling inheritance and we could be at the mall using my double points galaxy card on those shoes you haven't shut up about. . . oh well.

Oh brother, you caved instantly. 😂 That's embarrassing, have some backbone, young lady. You knew you were going to get what you wanted, good heavens, I'm raising a push over! Come on, let's get going. 😊

Your father has very. . . "erratic" methods of eliciting reactions. Please do your best to keep up!

There's absolutely no, zilch, nada, negative zero percentage chance that that dumbass somehow figured out how to procreate. I refuse to believe as such. There's not a single human being, dead or alive, stupid enough to even consider doing so with that braindead moron.

"Feels like we're running a daycare in this place... Is this what Calium felt like every single day when we were younger? Holy hell, am I going through a mid-life crisis right now? Am I at my "mid-life"?! Oh my Kairos, I can't even right now. . ."

“Oh my days. . .” Her words sent a shiver down his spine. He didn’t even have to ask, it was as if the delivery itself was enough to elicit truth serum. “Before I continue this conversation any further, I must pry, who did your mother end up being. . . oh spawn of thee Volver?”

"Sorry, my dear. I have this terrible thing with memory, ask your father, he will vouch for my transgressions." An annoyingly large, teetering on cheesy, smile would don his face as he quipped almost instantly in response.