Girls really do be getting the ick about anything huh

Margaret Scratcher

He’s got the old firm today why was he out so late?

I believe him.

Fulham, today I am really begging you for a miracle

Oh I KNOW who this is and I’m scared

bro CHILL nobody taking it from you I swear

I wanna fry the fella on the left, he looks like he’d be crispy

London living. I need to win the lottery

He doesn’t have dementia he’s just in disbelief

Current mood

What a fucking fanny

Yoda can now skip the queue at theme parks!

This has to be one of the funniest 5 word sentences I've ever read.

That last bit of pee in your bladder waiting for you to pull your underwear up

Whoever shot at Drake’s house is so reckless.

There are children in there for gods sake

I wish I spoke French. I wonder that this says