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I wish I could just mute people

When I was a kid, the only fake friends I had were imaginary.

Netflix has every movie except the one you're looking for

Is anybody else ready for the last day of school?

My homework brings all the Asians to the yard, and they're like "it wasn't that hard."

Mom: Why is everything on the floor? Me: Gravity mom.

Zombies only eat brains. Don't worry, you're safe.

Sarcasm is the best answer to a stupid question

Parents: Stop saying sorry Me: Sorry

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got 5 fingers The middle ones for you

My hand after writing an essay!

If I could remember school work like I remember lyrics... I would be a genius

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