I swagger on up to Area 51, and approach a quagmire of social media users who CHARGE toward the mysterious government facility. A few pesky kids make it inside & try to finagle away with an extraterrestrial being, BUT IT WOULD NOT GO, RIFLED AWAY BY SECURITY!

Andrew Luck has WAFFLEBOARDED AWAY THE NFL, OH WHAT CHAOS IN INDIANAPOLIS!

Pierre has been WAFFLEBOARDED AWAY!

Mike Babcock has been WAFFLEBOARDED AWAY!

2019 has been WAFFLEBOARDED AWAY!

The NBA season has been WAFFLEBOARDED AWAY!

Doc Emrick doing play by play of a windshield wiper installation is what the world needs right now.

As the real Doc makes a firewagon change into retirement, we will all have to maneuver through the quagmire that is the NHL without him. Nothing could shuffleboard more fans into their seats than hearing Doc call a hockey game. A truly legendary career, MY GOODNESS!

No, we will never waffleboard Doc away.

it’s crazy how all of these things rhyme

BIDEN, HE SCORES, ITS OVER!

Juzang finesses on in, FIRES, it wouldn’t go, ANOTHER TRY, HE SCORES, THE GAME IS TIED. Suggs hustles back the other way, HE FLINGS ONE FROM HALF COURT...HE SCORES, SUGGS, ITS OVER! GONZAGA WILL PLAY FOR THE TITLE, OH WHAT MARVELOUS CHAOS!

Chesnut shovels down 76 hot dogs & buns, a bald eagle soars overhead, the American flag waves high in the sky. He breaks his own world record, AGAIN, MY GOODNESS! The chant is “AMERICA”. Happy Fourth of July!

KELCE, HE SCORES, ITS OVER! AFTER SO MANY FIREWAGON LEAD CHANGES, THE CHIEFS HAVE WAFFLEBOARDED AWAY THE BUFFALO BILLS, WHAT MARVELOUS CHAOS IN ARROWHEAD!

Doc calls Sidney Crosby’s shootout winner at the 2008 Winter Classic. 🎥: NBC Sports

Retweet if you wish you could hear Doc call one more Stanley Cup Playoff game.

when my kids ask me what it was like to listen to doc emrick call a hockey game x.com/15_sappp/statu…