I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesnt work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

Redneck Threat: Don't you be makin' me open a can o' whup-ass on ya!

There are three ways a man wears his hair - parted- unparted or departed

There are never enough hours in a day, but always too many days before Saturday.

Johann von Goethe~ Thinking is easy acting is difficult and to put ones thoughts into action is the most difficult thing in the world.

Yelling "hey whore!" in my school hallway to see how many girls turn around...#YOLO

Ref: I'm sending you off Player: What for? Ref: The rest of the match!

why do men like arguing with you

Some people drink deeply from the fountain of knowledge, while some others only gargle.

Evan Esar~ A signature always reveals a mans character - and sometimes even his name.

What advice to cows give? Turn the udder cheek and mooooove on!

Simondes of Ceos~ Theres no joy even in beautiful Wisdom unless one have holy Health.

Knock Knock. Who's there! Cash! Cash who? Cash me if you can!

Driving without a license...#YOLO