( Colonel Kepler Happy birthday, sir.)

( Dr. Maxwell Normally I’d ask my Maxwell but I’ve had orders otherwise. But Kepler didn’t say I couldn’t ask all Maxwell’s so. I need a favour.)

(Officer Klein Agent, we’ve got a target spotted in engineering. Deadman’s are busy with their own assignments. This one’s all yours.)

Feel like I’m being insulted somewhere-

[Jacobi moves down the hall, also waiting until they’re out of earshot before he speaks again, facing ahead as he does.] Just so you know, you owe me a drink for both putting me in that situation and for me getting us out of it.

(alana maxwell you have terrible timing- I’ll be there soon.)

(So, I’m here doing /actual work/ and she gets to flirt with the AI? I see how it is- )

(“You’d think so-5 could keep then under control” oops, my hand slipped. My bad- no more comms! Bitch.)

(Pfft-)

Wait-

Where the hell is my goddamn cheeses!?

(𝗗𝗔𝗡𝗜𝗘𝗟 𝗝𝗔𝗖𝗢𝗕𝗜 Surprise.)

Y’know, I forgot how nice it is not being stuck on such a crowded ship.

Hey, what’s with all the copycats here!

Back on Earth, so many things to wreck.

Good to know that won’t be a problem… he says, sarcastically.

🍿

Happy birthday to me, adoring public leave your gifts at my door and bask in my greatness. 🥃🎉

:/

And I’m still in the building.