A dozen people in my newsroom are whistling and discussing techniques and I’d like to pull my eardrums out. Thanks for coming to my ted talk!

My father’s commentary as we took his only grandchild to a splashpad: “We’re all risking melanoma so we can stand under a faucet?” Carry on.

We needed a new fitted sheet, but I only like Purple brand modal sheets. Didn’t wanna drop $200… so I cut the elastic from our fitted sheet and spent 2.5 hrs hand sewing it onto the top sheet we never use. It’s perfect, but we need the option to buy JUST a fitted sheet 😅

I had like 8 things to do today, and I did ALL of them, plus I got to take a nap on the couch at my son’s daycare while I waited for him to wake up. Winning.

Throwback to last week when my dad was holding my toddler and showed him the thermostat. He then said “this is me being a thermostat,” and blankly stared forward for like 6 seconds. My son was enthralled. 70 degrees of incredible.

Pro tip: cheap sunglasses. Lost mine a month ago, ordered the same ones, they arrived the next day. Still haven’t found the originals. Opposing view point: I bought Rayban sunglasses 14 years ago. Still have them. My husband wears them now.

WE JUST SAW A MAILMAN WEARING A RED TANK TOP AND IM SO CONFUSED I DIDNT KNOW THEY COULD DO THAT!!!

Today my amazing husband Rob Jesselson texted me to tell me we were out of Diet Coke before I got home, so I was able to pick some up to replenish our stash. Not all heroes wear capes. Some wear Lululemon shorts and Goodfellow shirts from target.

A group of roadrunners is called a marathon or a race. Meep meep.

Annual reminder from our trip to Chicago… when my husband’s sister Jen was a teenager, she might have been Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift

Look the orange Tic Tac is unmatched.

Today I realized one of my favorite songs is 44 years old.

My sweet precious father called me this morning from his landline and asked me if I could do something about the SIM card on his phone so it wouldn’t be affected by the outage. His question equated to “can you take the shell off this nectarine so I can eat the popcorn?”

My son isn’t even 2 years old, and he’s already dipping his (side of) pinto beans into his (side of) guac from chipotle. I’m so proud.

I do think that promising to make Betty Crocker rainbow chip cake mix readily available in stores would a solid campaign platform.

Well 2.5 years ago, I said in my wedding vows that I would root for the Chicago Bears, even if the new coaching staff turned out to be garbage. Now that they’ve fired Eberflus (thank goodness), do I need to redo my vows?

🚨🚨 The Tucson Fire Department was dispatched to a call in the 5500 block of East Hawthorne Street at 4:18 this morning. Callers reported seeing smoke and flames in the area. When Engine 7 arrived at 4:25 they reported fire in a guesthouse that was being used for storage.

The best thing to come from the TikTok ban, is that men will no longer take 20 minutes to poop.

Hey Przemek Karnowski I’m at the Arizona Basketball game, wanna recreate this picture of us from your Gonzaga Basketball days?

Background info: I’m due with baby #2 in 4 months. An actual conversation in my house today… My husband to me and our son: “Team meeting. In 4 months… the NFL season starts.”