OMW to the liqa sto

i can’t wait to get to the phase of my life where i start golfing and smoking briskets and drinking heavily

What tha helly

it’s insane to me seeing ppl under 30 being red pill c*nservatives. like did u even try to have ur own beliefs or ideals other than ur racist parents?

love bombing always works on me because i do not respect myself

gonna start wearing clarks n birkenstocks n get really into the band 311

the woman i was madly in love w left me because i didn’t have a roth IRA

For as long as I've been alive, conservatives have been saying they need guns to defend themselves from a tyrannical government and as soon as they see people doing that they start crying, pissing and shitting themselves.

takeaways after working a white collar office job for a month: -it is very easy to become addicted to caffeine -having an hour lunch is bad ass

I’m a man of simple pleasures. All I need is a six-pack of beer, a joint of good weed, a couple gummies, 30 mg of Adderall, 0.5 mg Klonopin, a pizza, some ketamine nasal spray, a Coke Zero, half gram of blow, a Perc 30, a mock draft simulator, NFL pro and I’m perfectly content.

That’s for 9/11

Grandpa’s Glory @ Single Wide: -1 beer -1 shot of whiskey -1 single loose cigarette

RT

My favorite part about visiting my hometown is leaving

Every time I get into a quick chat w a stranger it expands my life expectancy by 5 years(unless they suck then it depletes it by 5 years)

He who controls the spice controls the flavor