I see many people who claim to love to travel Do they have access to teleportation devices that are free to operate?

There's a big sign near PDX that says "welcome to america's best airport!" Like claiming to be the world's tallest midget.

If all koalas in zoos were replaced by stuffed animals... Would any visitor tell the diff? They don't move. They never move.

Cold fried chicken lunch + smart phone = greasy smeary mess.

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Anytime you get to the airport early there is no line. Any time you are running late, massive line. Because fuck you, that's why.

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