A group of men kicked in my door today, demanding to know my favourite vegetable. I wasn't expecting the Spinach Inquisition!!!

The Home Office has made the decision to end plans to house asylum seekers at RAF Scampton, the former Ministry of Defence site in Lincolnshire.

A dentist attacked me with a turnip on my narrowboat the other day,it was root canal treatment.

Custer,Patton and Motors That's the limit of my general knowledge!

🤣😅🤣😅

It’s been six months since I joined the gym and no progress. I’m gonna go in person tomorrow to see what’s really going on.

I went to a really trendy nightclub last night. The doorman said to me "Sorry mate, I can’t let you in, you've had too many!" I said "What, drinks?" He said "No, birthdays".

Fair winds shipmate.💂🏻‍♀️👋🏻🇬🇧😔

Some people make it their life’s mission to wind people up .. I think I’m one of those people.

Stand Easy Shipmate. ⚓️

Please send me here. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻😍🫶🏻

Who remembers the pop wagon?

Imagine you miss a payment on a Tesla and it drives itself back to the dealership. Elon Musk 🤣😅🤣😅🤣

💂🏻‍♀️👋🏻🇬🇧💐.

Sleep well troops! Tomorrow, we dust ourselves off and go again! #CedeNullis. 💂🏻‍♀️👋🏻🇬🇧🍻