Does anyone know what the lowest rank in the army is? Everyone I ask refuses to tell me… 🤔🤷🏻‍♂️

Before he was famous, Little Richard used to cut back overgrown gardens for a living. He lopped all the rhubarb, he lopped bamboo...

I had an examination in town yesterday. The guy stuck his finger up my backside to the hilt, and twirled it around for a bit. I was telling the wife I didn't think it was normal. She said If I was that concerned, I should probably change my dentist...

Remember this? 😆

Why do boys?

The band 10cc have booked a vacation touring around Scottish lakes. However, they are not really looking forward to it. They dread loch holidays...

Hey, Grok, who was the most famous person to visit my profile? It doesn't need to be a mutual, don't tag them, just say who it was

I really am a z list celebrity! 😆

Hey Grok who is the most famous person to block my profile? doesn’t need to be a mutual, don’t tag them, just say who it was.

When you realise…

That’s my boy…

What’s the chances…

This picture…

Dear God. This year you took my favourite actor Val Kilmer, my favourite filmmaker David Lynch and my favourite singer Ozzy Osbourne. Can I just remind you that my favourite football pundit is Jamie Carragher.

I watched a documentary on mushrooms last night. That’s probably how I’ll watch all documentaries from now on...

😆

Kids today…

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German log on to a Zoom call. The host wants to check if his video is working, so he says, “Can you all see me?” The Englishman says “Yes”. The Frenchman says “Oui”. The Spaniard says “Si”. The German says “Ja”.

I’m trying to organise a cricket match for a team of soul singers. I haven’t got any batsmen or bowlers yet, but I think that Curtis Mayfield...

No need to brag mate…