Clary: I told you everything I know. Alec: Liar, liar. Plants for hire. Clary: It’s pants on fire, Alec. Alec: Well. You would know, liar.

// WHAT A FUCKING MOOD MY MUSE IS THRIVING FINALLY x.com/manuscruentae/…

// IF MORE MARYSE ACCOUNTS DONT START POPPING UP IM SUING x.com/manuscruentae/…

New favorite gif alert! #Malec

It would have been better, but the recipe was apparently off. x.com/amaranthinedoo…

// YALL IVE ACTUALLY GOT ALL MY REPLIES TYPED UP FOR THIS ACCOUNT AND IM GOING TO SEND THEM ALL OUT ONCE I GET HOME AJSKAJSKKS

Ahem. He doesn’t lie. “I followed the recipe exactly. I don’t know what went wrong. I blame mom for tricking me into thinking it was good in the first place.” x.com/amaranthinedoo…

Listen. It was a good idea at the time. They needed information, and they didn’t have any other ways of obtaining it. And you know what they say: boyfriends who break into houses together stay together. x.com/moreangelthanu…

We’ll fix it. We’ll probably just have to go through the ceremony again. We should probably schedule that with the Silent Brothers. x.com/moreangelthanu…

This sounds like the best idea Alec has heard all day. x.com/amaranthinedoo…

// this spacing is disgusting. x.com/aliferousarche…

He must not tell lies, and he doesn’t. “Well, no, but she could have told me later on in life.” x.com/amaranthinedoo…

A change of opinion doesn’t mean he’s lying. Plus, ‘pretty good looking’ and ‘sexy’ are two completely different concepts. “Fair point, but I wish someone would have told me before I went on about it like it was the best recipe ever.” x.com/amaranthinedoo…

Soft™ x.com/amaranthinedoo…

THESE ARE THINGS HE DID NOT NEED TO SEE. ABORT MISSION. ABORT MISSION.

Welp. Time to go bleach his eyes.

Mastering the gay panic™

Kicks down the door. He’s here.