About to write an insufferable personal essay about going to this concert & how music from when you were younger becomes a kind of time travel where you are your younger self and your current self, both experiencing the same notes as a different song simultaneously in the present

I'm going to see Death Cab for Cutie this weekend and I cannot wait for the collective catharsis of screaming I NEED YOU SO MUCH CLOSER with 18k other people until our voices give out

The NHL should do a single-elim mini-playoffs between all the dead franchise teams. Whalers v Maroons v Eagles v Americans etc. Just for fun. Teams of players from across the league like the All-Stars games. I bet people would eat up merch, rooting for their old-timey home team.

happy Saint Patrick's Day to all but especially to one man

Do I post here if I’m gonna do a thing? Bluesky? Should I just post to Patreon and then set up something to auto link it? What do you do now to let people know you’re Doing Things?

“So, there’s this hockey player.”
- “Okay.”
“And he keeps inviting his teammates to cooking classes and paint nights. And he has a bunch of houseplants and plays the piano. Oh and he loves Star Wars Lego.”
- “Alright.”
“Anyway he plays-”
- “Goalie.”
“Yes, goalie, obviously.”

We can never have nice things. Cities were a mistake.

I need y’all to know that each part of this next sentence is about to melt your brain:

There is a new musical coming out
based on the film Teeth
about vagina dentata
written by the Tony award-
and Pulitzer Prize-winning writer
of the 2022 Best Musical “A Strange Loop.”

Nature may abhor a vacuum, but nature loves a damp hole. Tell me I’m wrong, I dare you.

Elmo I'm gonna be real I am at my fucking limit

People who sleep with straight men — just carry your own condoms, too. What if he’s had it in his back pocket wallet too long? What if he thought there was one left and they’re out? What if he thinks carrying one is assuming too much? As Shania said, Let’s go, girls.

High school government classes should actually teach you how to run for office, in particular locally.

When Nintendo was at an extremely low point, Iwata said something we haven't really seen since.

The slow decay of Twitter combined with how many people dropped off has made it all lose its luster for me. It’s odd to have nostalgia for a place you still have?

Fucking hate companies are doing away with the ability to just TALK to someone to resolve an issue or question!

Trying to figure out a strange charge on my account from Lyft and every page just reroutes me to the same bullshit FAQs and my ride history (which doesn't include it)

Oh you don’t want 100s of links to things I find funny and made me think of you, across multiple messaging platforms?? You should have considered that before you became my friend