Sunak may have had a pretty shonky first 24hours of election campaign but I think the “Inauspicious Start Award” really has to go to the SNP. Swinney confirms they need to find money to fund campaign, goes out to bat for Michael Mathieson & Operation Branchform gets an update.

Come get your black bin bags
They're on offer till december
Come get your black bin bags
They're long and black and slender

'They were probably more worried about the big boats rather than small boats in 1066...'

Sophy Ridge asks Richard Tice 🇬🇧 why Reform UK have chosen 1066 - the year William the Conqueror arrived in England - to compare migration levels.

trib.al/ftpea6d

📺 Sky 501

Rishi Sunak's closing speech to the electorate

'imagine if you will, the day after the election, when that first flight leaves for Rwanda, and onboard, someone who came to this country illegally, and who has no right to remain here'

The idea is to catch your opponents off guard, not your own side.

'I know what you're thinking, £15k a month for Zone 4 2 bed is a lot of money but I've got a queue of Russian exiles just waiting to sign on the line that is dotted so, do you want it or not'

I've had to turn off notifications for this but if you'd like to see the ascent of man in reverse, take 10 mins to read the replies

Police Scotland review their evidence room prior to handing the case to the Procurator Fiscal.

This works out to 1 'plan' every 10 seconds

Going to be a long 6 weeks or 362,880 mentions of 'plan' depending on how you look at it

NEW - Jeremy Corbyn is expected to announce he is standing as an independent today.

Announcement could be within next few hours

Going to miss seeing updates from the Treasury flickr account, I particularly liked the ones of Jeremy Hunt and his invisible balls

Was it? Gosh, if only my parents had sent me to Eton rather than Winchester I might have known that

Now I just feel silly

Rishi Sunak taking a brave approach to small talk at a brewery in Wales.

He asked workers if they're looking forward to 'all the football'. One quickly pointed out that Wales haven't qualified for the Euros 😬

It’s going to be a long six weeks.

General Boles This is like saying Germany immigrated into Poland in 1939 you stupid retard.