I've been asleep for a while, but @the_girls do you fancy a bum?

I need a Easter Sunday jump. ASAP

Every girl I have been with even the close ones is wiped from my mind the moment I step into the street in pursuit of my ultimate companion

The Ear is back in town! Tonights a new one. The Dorchester for girl and fiancé to observe. Hired gun.

Faced with two women, I find myself quantifying and extrapolating their assets and virtues. Hair, hands, bone structure, width of leg, shoe.

All of the previous in an instant which does not cover their imagined personalities, or lack of perhaps.

I met her in a bent corridor.

Fell in love twice on the tube this morning.

Check out @palomafaith last tweet... She's the new Bono.

I want everything to be bigger, apart from my wife's vagina.

All women are left in a suspended state of wanting more until they realise they won't get.

New ground... Cock in glass of milk to cool it down. #firstdatefacts

That's 3 more lovely experiences in 3 days. Kundera's reflections on the womaniser in search of perfection in the image of the self!

It's 8.30. This girls skin is unbelievably flawless! We both know that we may as well adjourn to the hotel right now.

This Friday I will be whispering on slightly uncharted territory - Richmond. Let's see what happens?!

The pornography generation is full of 20 something girls with all sorts deviant spit and anus tricks up their sleeves.

I love walking against the flow of traffic. People walking to work on a Monday morning as I walk home.

Saturday night into Monday morning. Groin warm and painful. And oesophagus that needs cleansing. New pin on the conquest map Warwick Ave.

Off out whispering again tweeps. Been on a break for a few weeks but back with a real horn!

I met a beautiful women... I couldn't though, within a second I noticed her massive hands.