i am a hater first and a beautiful beautiful woman second

i dealt with one inconvenience today i think that’s enough for the week

“i’m just a girl” so close you’re just like your father

don’t come over i’m feeling especially evil today

lana del rey performing at coachella is the super bowl for people with depression

ok but what if instead of stepping outside my comfort zone, i step into an even comfier zone

it is horrible when your birthday is over like now i’m just a civilian

charlie brown snapped with “good grief” and winnie the pooh cooked with “oh bother”

I just saw someone refer to Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce as “The English teacher and PE teacher getting it on” AND I LOST MY MIND 💀💀💀

That Row, Row, Row Your Boat person nailed it. Life really is but a dream.

Allegedleigh would be a great girls’ name.

I love when a car honks and the other car honks back. Yes! Kill each other!

So many times throughout the day I feel like that Ben Affleck smoking meme.

maybe in another universe i make sense when i talk

My safe word is 'Liberty Biberty'

Sorry if I seem bitchy and standoffish, it's just that I'm bitchy and standoffish.

Don’t make me get chalant up in here