This season of vanderpump was boring and had too much scheana

is this…. a normal chipotle portion? I haven’t eaten here in forever and this seems ridiculous

[gf, software engineer, $200,000/year, talking with coworkers]: Yeah, my bf is between jobs right now but he’s looking so hard! I’m so proud of him!

[me, drunk as shit at 9:00 am and lost in the woods, about to pet a skunk from behind]: damn, this cat smoke Loud ass hhell

popsicle man

hehehe

My bf is impossible to wake up on the weekend, like his brother confirmed he’s always been like that. He will go “just a couple more minutes” forever!!! I’ve started just leaving him in bed and going to do stuff. Once I’m up I am ready to go immediately

had an exciting morning

Remember when we were told protests that block traffic were bad because what about ambulances?