"I wasn't meant for Excel spreadsheets. I was meant to fight in Caesar's legions." Dude, the Romans would have gone nuts for Excel

Parenthood is one of the few ways we can transcend our selves—not painlessly, but nevertheless, joyfully.

“I asked chatgpt” “I asked grok” well I asked the desert fathers and unless you despise your self-will and renounce all worldly concerns you shall never have peace

“I asked chatgpt” “I asked grok” well I asked the oracle at Delphi and she said Socrates is the wisest man in all of Athens

My dad was in a car accident almost a year ago. He spent three weeks in a coma. During that time, the only things he could hear, if he heard anything at all, were my little brother whispering, “Fight, Dad,” and the Braveheart score playing softly from my phone. My mom never

Make Coke Mexican Again!

“I asked Grok” and “I asked ChatGPT” yeah well I asked a magic ring into which Sauron poured his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life, and he said Get Bent, Loser

That the Roman Empire was bad, actually. (And I love Antiquity and the time of the Roman Empire)

I have all Twitter notifications turned off and then also never look back at my previous tweets. I could be slamming bangers or empty farts, I’d never know. Each tweet is a fully realized world, ephemeral and transcendent, which bursts like a bubble and is thus annihilated.

This photo of Cardinal Pizzaballa praying the Rosary with children in Gaza was the final straw to convince Joel Berry that they were in fact, working with Hamas

And it was amazing. 10/10 no notes, as the kids say today

I’m sorry, but we can’t accommodate this. Gen X is 1965 to 1980. If we start making exceptions everyone will say they’re Gen X, it will be chaos.

The Silver Chair is definitely under rated, but there is simply no equal to A Horse and His Boy. It is the Narnia volume without equal. FIN. For Aslan.

I also remember watching the first season of South Park live, as it aired in 1997, when I was a junior in college. What a time to be alive. Pax Americana indeed

Just give whoever took this a Pulitzer

Very Normal and Very Cool everyone. This is totally how the Founders expected our federal government to work.

Counterpoint: No, it didn’t.

The comments on this banger are legendary. I can’t even tell satire from serious any more…

Wut? I mean….wut!?!?