Someone needs to do a Mystery Show about what happened to Mystery Show, and then a Heavyweight for how everyone felt about it.

You only hear about registered nurses. Shout out to all the unregistered nurses out there, who forgot to register or refused to for some reason. You don't know their lives.

Never forget ❤️. Chicago Party Aunt

current administration is fyre fest.

“you come at the king you best not miss”

This is a reoccurring nightmare for me

“Alright, it’s time to let my personality go fucking crazy” -every dad talking to a waitress

Chris: what if she’s just not that into you? Colton:

A good way to hide something from me forever would be to say it loudly & clearly in a voicemail you left on the phone I carry with me everywhere at all times.

Are we great again or it that, like, later?

Where's Wallace, String? Where the fuck is Wallace? #Debates2020

Absolutely no shade to Obama, but how on earth is the last episode of WTF with Marc Maron not Lorne Michaels

Chicago at its best today #womensmarchChi x.com/cnn/status/822…

Walking out of work on a friday like...

(left)

Junior Secret Service Agent: POTUS & the Saudis wanna dance around w/swords. Senior Agent: (removes glasses, rubs eyes) Fine, whatever.

When you enter a revolving door at the same moment but on opposite sides of someone you only kinda know #awkward

.Chicago Party Aunt u on this? x.com/chicagotribune…

Almost feel bad for Zuckerberg. There’s no way he left that room full of old people without having to set up their wifi.