A definition of hard work: a meeter and greeter at Bonnie Blue's house warming party! #BadJokeFriday #LunchPun

The missus has a work friend called Dotty. I am, by association, a friend of Dorothy's. Much to her amusement. #sidesplittingsunday #LunchPun

My mate chatting with a bloke down the pub. 'I used to go stalking regularly, out in all weathers.' 'What ... you got arrested?' 'No the deer hunting season ended!' #mondaymirth #LunchPun

For older gagsters: The Tide not coming in, just doesn't wash with me! #tuesdaytitters #LunchPun

"Better inside pissing out of the tent, than from outside pissing in." Good advice at Glastonbury, but not Camping World down the precinct!' #WednesdayWit #LunchPun

Someone is playing fast and loose with this crappy generic Imodium! #BadJokeThursday #LunchPun

My mate's got a trashy Canadian girlfriend. She looks like she's done more lumberjacks than falling trees! #BadJokeFriday #LunchPun

My mate was caught in a sweaty love triangle. That's why he doesn't perform with the Halle Orchestra any longer! #sidesplittingsunday #LunchPun

It was so cold out this morning, all the perverts could only be charged with decent exposure! #mondaymirth #LunchPun

My mate's new girlfriend has had so much work done, her annual health check follows the building code! #tuesdaytitters #LunchPun

The Blackpool Hallucinations are definitely on. Go and see them if you don't believe your eyes! #WednesdayWit #LunchPun

Tried to join an online support group for Multiple Personality Disorders. Too many forms of ID requested! #BadJokeThursday #LunchPun

My mate's stage name was 'Aaron Aaronsson.' He thought auditions were in alphabetical order. #BadJokeFriday #LunchPun

My mate on a caribbean holiday at a beach bar, 'I'll have the turtle soup ... and make it snappy!' #sidesplittingsunday #LunchPun

Why did the chicken cross to the otherside? Because it became roadkill. #mondaymirth #LunchPun

My mate found a pack of Happy Familys playing cards in the caravan. 'Let's make this exciting ... I'll up the ante!' #tuesdaytitters #LunchPun

The lad in Costa Coffee had loads of facial piecings, rings and studs. 'Rumour has it he's going to be a great actor at stage school.' 'I bet he'll be worth more for scrap!' #wednesdaywit #LunchPun

They're whitewashing the importance of window dressers in window shopping down the empty malls these days! #badjokethursday #LunchPun

Storms are like marriage followed by divorce. There's a lot of banging and blowing, then you lose your house! #badjokethursday #LunchPun

How do you mute a swan? Me neither! Me either (US). #sidesplittingsunday #LunchPun