Actually kind of impressive to write a tweet about something wicked that's coming this way and still not stick the landing.

Finally finished work, had to let dad down that I'm not doing the care home tonight and i feel like a monster. Also mam isn't adjusting to dad's new room because she doesn't really know where it is. Honestly one person's heart can only take so much. 💔

me: *opens car door*
wife: where are you going?
me: my country needs me

We only rate dogs. This is a very large duckling. He is very cute, but please only send dogs. Thank you... 12/10

Finally had The Inspection, went fine as usual. Now I would like to let out a big stress cry for a few days if that's ok.

Fuck Eurovision.

This stance is not something they can recover from. Palestinians need our support now, 6 months ago, a decade ago, 75 years ago. When the institutions supporting genocide attempt to clear their name years from now, it will be too late - never let them forget it

Avocado: hello, I'm good fat

Bacon: **lights cigarette** **punches avocado**

Will be referring to myself as an Influencer from now on. Queen of Content Creation all shall love me and despair also I might take up selling toothpaste or whatever it is one does when one is a contentier

That June Nintendo Direct has to do just two things...

BREAKING: Aragorn son of Arathorn, who is called Elessar, the Elfstone, Dúnadan, the heir of Isildur Elendil's son of Gondor has arrived at the 2024 #MetGala

Mom, you're embarrassing me in front of the hostages!

This is so beautiful

Russell Brand

Bloody hell Kermit's ripped

Omg peeks and pokes! Yes I had this and no I did not understand it

girls will be like “it’s fine” then start drawing a pentagram in blood on their floorboards