'I don't care what the doctor said, you're starting work at Nando's first thing tomorrow'

GIRLS TOURNAMENT

We are delighted to announce we will have a special guest to present the trophy at our girls tournament this summer ..

Thank you to Newcastle United number 9, Katie Barker, for agreeing to join us!

If you'd like to enter a team email [email protected].

You could sort out the state of NHS mental health services - or you could tell people needing them that they’re the problem.

FA Cup replays dispensed with because the handful of precious corporates don't want such inconvenience in their elite schedules.
Well, if they were that fucking good they wouldn't be needing replays in the first place would they?

#FACup #forthefew #savefootball #corrupt
#footballfamilyisdead #footyisntjust4tv

Remember, kids watch for free at the Stan.

MATCH DAY

Join us this evening as we take on league leaders, Shildon. It doesn’t get much tougher a test than this!

Adults £7, Over 65s £4 and kids free.

Gates open from 6pm, don’t leave it late to arrive!

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NEXT MATCH

Quick turnaround again as we are back in action again on Wednesday night, this time against top of the league Shildon!

Let’s PACK THE PARK for this one. You really can be the 12th man as we aim to keep our brilliant home run going.

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MATCH DAY

Following a morning pitch inspection by the referee we can confirm today’s match is ON!

See you this afternoon. ⚫️⚪️

#NewProfilePic

Matt Le Tissier was right 🤯

There's only one man in world football who could stop Phil Foden on this form...

This intro didn’t age well.

MATCH DAY

Gates open at 1:30pm for a 3pm kick off. Come and support the lads in this big clash!

Brendan Clarke-Smith MP Seriously mate what is wrong with you? Let me tell you what people in the UK hate...spiralling bills, lying chancers, shit in rivers, waiting, years for a medical referral. Take your inability to hold more than one thing in your tiny brain to the electorate.

“Impressed he’s risen from the dead? He’s Jesus. That’s his job.”

The sun came out today for the Heaton Stan Jnrs Easter Egg Cup 2024.
It was a delight to see players, families & coaches come together as one big black & white team for a fun & friendly event generating egg donations from the players for the Great North Children’s Hospital.

NEXT MATCH

A big match at Grounsell Park on bank holiday Monday! Your support is needed as we take on Birtley Town.

Gates open 1:30pm for a 3pm KO.

£7/£4/bairns free.

Siri… show me a man who’d cheerfully donate a toe to experience a Dutch oven off Donald Trump…

Nigel Farage once again pointing at his own skid marks and pretending that someone else snook in and sharted in his underpants

When a government is more interested in a flag on a football shirt than hungry children they shouldn’t be in power.