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So… I bought a tiny cat couch.

✨I’ve come back solely to present you with this handsome monstrosity✨

… Nice 😎

y’all

My new apartment has cabinets that are 7 ft up and I am screaming ☠️ I don’t need my mac and cheese to be in space

Why is everyone I match with on tinder an off-brand John Wick—

I didn’t ask for this new type, just gimme some ladies please ☠️☠️

Shein thinks I’m a whole ass freak 😂😂😂

A pretty lady just complimented my outfit and asked about my witchy purse... and I accidentally said “thank you ma’m” because I had been texting my mom ☠️ This is why I can’t get a girlfriend

✨🍓 i recently quit my job because it was actively making my mental health decline terribly so i'm opening commissions! DM me if you're interested!

please retweet this, it helps me out a lot! 🐷💕

🌸 ko-fi.com/caerwych 🌸

Me: Don’t fuck with me, I gotta knife

The knife:

It sucks when it happens, but I’m telling myself that I’m better off without people who don’t value me and that I now have the emotional room for even better friendships that I’m starting to build ✨

Me: I’m gonna get so much done when I get home after work

Also me, .5 seconds after getting in the door:

Well now I need a wall of mugs AND a wall of books 😪 Gotta up my gay game and get a tool belt soon

I need to finish packing, but I keep getting distracted by clothes it’s too cold to actually wear 😪

Imagine being gaslit by UberEATS taking special instructions off your order after you complained about them not being followed and telling you that you’re at fault 🙄